It's not all about meditation

 I have been asked to talk at a WI meeting next year. Plenty of time to think about how to go about it.

I can't help thinking about how Tony Blair got it so so wrong with an audience of the WI and the dearly departed queen got it so right HM Elizabeth II

I won't be talking politics and I am not a British monarch so won't have the level of expectation that would have met those two, but I do feel a sense of responsibilty to not mess it up! 

As part of my mindfulness course ( MTTC ) I was able to have a 1-2-1 session with an experienced Dharma teacher, Suchitra Senoy who gently listened as I shared my thoughts.  I haven't yet got a plan (I don't think I need to do 3 months ahead of time!) but I am feeling confident that I can share some insights and give some practical takeaways to the group.

Mostly I intend to demystify and myth bust and show the positives and benefits of living mindfully.

Maybe I will share a recipe at the end too ;) And that isn't me trying to be 'cute'. Go with what I beleive in, share things that I have experienced and show that mindfulness is so much more than meditation. 

It's October

 With the onset of Autumn and darker evenings and mornings there's been a noticeable change in the daily chit-chat .

'irs so cold / dark/ grey/ wet/ grim,' and so on.

I must admit that getting out of bed when it's pitch dark and chilly isn't my most favourite thing to do.

BUT ( and it's a big but) consider the alternative... What if today was the last day you had? What if the words you say to someone are the last you say or the last they hear.

Sometimes a good old moan is just what's needed , but with each anniversary of my journey around the sun I feel increasingly fortunate to be here, to have my loved ones , to have the luxury of being able to moan about the things that don't really matter. 

Mindfulness: noticing what's happening now, being aware , doing kind things. These bring a sense of calm and peace. I've had more journeys round the sun than I have left ( unless something pretty phenomenal happens with medicine !) and I want to live and find pleasure in things that can go unnoticed. 

I won't lie, dark mornings and evenings aren't my favourites, but blankets , candles, fires, hot chocolate and even more blankets are great! And all that rain is filling up the water butts nicely on the allotment! 

Discovering there's more than I realised to mindfulness

 'Mindfulness? That's just colouring and switching off your mind isn't it?'

'Like counselling but without any actual science or research-based practise isn't it?'

'Bit modern and really not my thing at all.'

A few things that I have heard. 

It's hard to sum up mindfulness in a way that doesn't diminish it. Yes it is about being present, yes it is about being tuned into feelings. Yes to being empathetic, kind and listening. Yes to being non-judgemental.

All these and so much more.  Being kind, showing empathy, being authentic being curious, appreciating life, self, others. Being kind.  These are some of the underpinning aspects. 

Being kind to oneself, showing self-compassion. Bit of a game changer in many ways. SO easy to blame oneself, berate oneself, criticise oneself.  

It's ok to big yourself up- to take a look in the mirror and tell yourself that you are going to have a fab day, and when the day doesn't go so well say that you gave it a good go.

So much more than 'put on a brave face' , 'chin-up' and other often less than helpful phrases.

Acknowledgement goes a lot lot further. Today has been pretty shocking. I am not feeling great about it. I could just not bother tomorrow. All these are totally valid thoughts. Naming, recognising and noticing them. Taking time to process, talk them through or go for a walk, listen to music, make a noise, sing, go for a run.  We all have different ways to redirect energy. 

It's not about parking thoughts, ignoring them or forgetting the past. It's about riding it out. 

I love the film 'Parenthood' and especially this gem from the Grandma:

Grandma's thoughts on life

Ups and downs, highs and lows, happy and sad. All part of life. But I know which parts  I want to focus on.