Here is this week's effort; followed by some ramblings.
How long had it been? Was it ten years, or eleven? Too long...
Kit pushed the key into the rusted lock- reluctantly it turned and the door swung open. Cobwebs brushed against her face as she stepped into the hallway. Flicking the switch just disturbed a sleepy spider which scuttled into a corner. Ridiculous to think the lights would work after all this time.
The sun shone, but the grimy windows let little light through. Why had she been so stubborn and not come back before now? So many questions unanswered. How would she ever find out the truth?
This is my attempt for this week's challenge. Having read some of the other entries I was really nervous about writing at all! There are a lot of talented people out there. If only the news and media spent a bit more time celebrating all the great things about this country and what real people can do (not celebs) then perhaps that would not be such a bad thing. One of my favourite comedy sketches was on the Fast Show when Mark Williams is the character who manages to always put his foot in it when in the company of his "well educated" self opinionated friends". The sketch I refer to is the one when they are discussing events in the news and criticising non-news stories (such as pets being rescued). Mark pipes up "I love it when they finish the news with a happy story, it really cheers me up!" His so called friends freeze him out, "I'll get my coat." his final line.
(Apologies to anyone reading this who has not heard of the Fast Show- not to everyone's taste but I love it!).
Anyway, I digress. My point- yes there is one! is that ,. in my opinion, far too much time is spent telling us all about the bad news. Well, surely this should change. At least some of the cleanups that happened after the riots had some publicity; but I bet there were loads which didn't. I firmly believe that the vast majority of people in the UK are decent people, and that there things going on each day which never get recognised. So, the news SHOULD end with a round up of good things that go on- it's about time that publicity shouldnt just be about the bad things that go ont or the endless goings on of celebrities. I really couldn't care less about the relaitonships/earnings/personal lives/pets/holidays etc of the celebs- but I DO care about what goes on in my local area and my country and would love to hear more about that.
Perhaps I am just too chilled out in holiday mode. Of course the news needs to report what is happening; but does it all have to be bad?
Sorry if you think this is naive- maybe it is a bit; but I think a more positive portrayal of our country wouldn't be a bad thing!
Don't know why you were nervous about sharing this one, Anna. It's brilliant! It's got quite creepy feel to it, but with just enough lighter touches (like the sleepy spider) to stop it being over the top. I think this piece is pitched perfectly!
ReplyDeleteThank you :) There are so many talented writers out there that I feel mine are rather lightweight...would love to write a book one day - just waiting for an idea that has substance!
ReplyDeleteI agree with Sally-Jayne. I love your use of the prompt and am intrigued by the situation.I think this story has marvelous potential, and I would read every word.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your kind comments; I have really enjoyed these 100 word challenges .
ReplyDeletereally super and very atmospheric - lovely x
ReplyDeleteThankyou. 100 words isn't a lot to play with- effort number one was at 200 odd words! serious editing followed!
ReplyDeleteExcellent story. I am intrigued to learn more. There are questions left unanswered for me!
ReplyDeleteThanks Bill; just read yours.It's so interesting to see the varied ways that each prompt is interpreted.
ReplyDeleteI agree that you shouldn't have been nervous. It is a great 100 words and you have really painted a graphic picture of the house. Of course now we want to know the story behind it!!
ReplyDeleteI like this one, too. It's the beginning of a mystery I'd like to know more about. I like the way you described the scene-- the feelings and the way it looks.
ReplyDeleteThank you for the comments; I may well see if I can develop this further...
ReplyDeleteIt is really atmospheric and I love the sleepy spider too! You set a scene very well and I'd love to know the background to go with the story. I think you're a great writer and you should write your book! ;O)
ReplyDeleteThank you. I loved your poem :D
ReplyDeleteThe sleepy spider was such a lovely touch. it gave a lift to a dark place.
ReplyDeleteThanks for taking the time to comment. I didn't want it to be too depressing; after all , the sun was shining ;D
ReplyDelete"would love to write a book one day - just waiting for an idea that has substance!" I know exactly what you mean. Your piece has a certain mystery that makes you want to keep reading. Will be following with interest ... :)
ReplyDeleteThank you. Lol if katie price can do it. .. ;)
ReplyDeleteI loved this and can understand your nervousness but once you throw yourself in the pot, it's quite nice isn't it?
ReplyDeleteLoved this story, don't like spiders and it's all very mysterious, I'd read on that's for sure
This is excellent, well done. I love your imagery and your descriptive language. It does leave me wanting more.
ReplyDeleteThanks for taking the time to comment. Stuck on this weeks at the moment ...
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