Endeavours

This is a piece I recently submitted to a writing website for publication. It was written in response to a photograph of a girl with a reflection behind her of wings. I would very much appreciate comments (good or bad!)

Angel

Nobody believed me; they just laughed or chose to ignore. “Poor little thing.” I could hear their hushed voices, “She’ll grow out of it, you’ll see.”

“It’s just a phase.”

I don’t remember the exact moment it started but to me it seemed the most natural thing in the world. For the first time since she’d died the world had started to make sense once more. They said it was my reaction to losing her- those whisper-voiced people who mistakenly thought I was unaware of their conversations. I heard each and every word.

It was the way they looked at me, or if I’m more precise, didn’t look at me that particularly grated. Never quite making eye contact, over earnest smiles that stopped at too thin lips, the talking about me as if I wasn’t there. Or worse was too young (or stupid) to understand. They knew it was true but because they couldn’t explain or understand it they chose to hide behind their hands and write me off as precocious, attention seeking. A problem.

So, they’d point and laugh when they thought I wasn’t looking, “That’s the one, you know, she’s a bit different.”

“Never the same since her mother died.”

“Over active imagination. Lives in a fantasy.”

They are all wrong. I can feel myself growing stronger each day. Last night I managed my first flight. Mother held me tightly the whole time but I could feel the strength in my wings, almost ready to fly solo and join her at last. Then they would see I hadn’t been lying. 

The doctors said it was a tumour just like the one that took her. That was the reason for my mood swings, my “imagination”. Tablets would help they said, but I knew they wouldn’t. I let them believe I was taking them- I had them well hidden along with the long since shed downy feathers. Now I have white ones - golden fringed- the exact shade of my hair when the sunlight catches it.  They light up my darkened room when spread. Mother doesn’t need to hold me tonight. I am ready for the journey.

I wanted to leave a feather for my father. Try as I might it wouldn’t come with pulling so I had to resort to the nail scissors. Strangely it came away, before the first cut had been made, to be instantly replaced by another. It faded a little as I placed it on my pillow. I knew that Father believed me deep down, but would never admit to that in front of the others. As a respectable doctor he had to keep up appearances. I would be sorry to leave him, but since she’d died he’d been increasingly distant, the pain etched more deeply across his face each time he looked at me. The feather would keep us close. If he let himself believe he would be able to see us both in more than dreams.

They would all know that I had been telling the truth once I’m gone. Perhaps I should stay a little longer but the need to spread my wings is too great. She is calling me.

 Can you hear her?

I feel her reaching out. Maybe I will come back one day...

100 words week 57

I haven’t taken part in the 100wcgu since July as I have been concentrating on a variety of mini writing projects as well as recharging ready for the new school year.  Now that the new term is underway I will endeavour to take part as often as possible in an effort to improve my writing skills. This week's prompt is:

...returning to the routine...

Details found at http://jfb57.wordpress.com/2012/09/10/100-word-challenge-for-grown-ups-week-57/

I have (so far) been unsuccessful with my submissions to various websites and competitions but will keep trying!

As always, constructive criticism is welcomed J

September

The alarm snaps me out of my dreams and the incessant bass of the music drums out the final vestiges of sleep. I reach for the snooze button, glowering at the illuminated numbers. I haven’t seen this time since the last day of term. I reluctantly leave the music playing, swing my legs over the side of the bed and half stagger to the bathroom, eyes beginning to focus. Not until the water is pulsing over my body do my eyes open fully. Stretching, I dry off and sing along. A new term and class awaits; retuning to the routine isn’t so bad.

Read the others at    http://www.linkytools.com/wordpress_list.aspx?id=162399&type=basic&AspxAutoDetectCookieSupport=1

100 word challenge week 51

I haven't had much time these last few weeks with the end of term craziness that all teachers will be familiar with. 

And now summer has finally arrived and I am sitting in the garden, shaded by the parasol with the hum of bees in the fuchsia beside me, two contented cats sprawled out on the patio, a cloudless blue sky, a gentle breeze and a glass of Pimms  water (it's only just after four in the afternoon; far too early for that just yet!) by my side. 

I have just about managed to resist rereading my campnanowrimo piece just yet- leaving it for a while longer before some major editing and maybe then I will share some here as I would love some feedback.

I am very lucky to be heading off to the Dordogne at the end of the week- surrounded by vineyards and no wifi to be found. I have a notebook ready for writing in while I am away in between the pile of books I plan to read...

This week's prompt from Julia was …. the line was drawn …. 

all details at http://jfb57.wordpress.com/2012/07/23/100-word-challenge-for-grown-ups-week51/

Here is my contribution. Thanks for reading. Comments, as always, welcomed :)

You said what?

He stopped as though someone had pressed pause. His fork hovered between plate and mouth, spaghetti strands unwinding in slow motion before rejoining the others.

“You’re what?” he spluttered.

“You heard. I’m leaving.”

“You can’t. You’re nothing without me.” he placed his fork on the table adjusting it until it was at precisely 90 degrees to the table’s edge.

“It’s over.” she pushed the piece of paper across the table. He picked it up to see the line was drawn through their surname.

As she walked towards the door she ran her hand along the
 row of perfectly aligned pictures leaving each one askew.




Read the others at http://www.linkytools.com/wordpress_list.aspx?id=155445&type=basic

Challenges of the job...

As the end of the summer approaches and the final words are added to the end of year reports it is time to look back at the year and start to think ahead to the next.

This has been the first year since qualifying (back in '91- last century !) that I have shared a class as a part time teacher. I teach 3 days each week (Wed-Fri) and I can honestly say that making the decision to go part time was definitely one of the best decisions I have ever made. It has renewed my enthusiasm for the job no end as well as giving me time to pursue my own interests and passions, some of which have enhanced my teaching , others have just made me a happier person! (and as a result a happier teacher!)

This year I have taught a mixed year 4 /5 class and will be doing the same next year. All the year 4's will stay with us to be joined by the rest of the year 4s along with some year 3's taking us to 35 in total (ratio 2:1 year 5:4)

Inevitably there have been questions raised by parents about this; it will be a challenging year. But every single class is challenging!
I read a blog the other day about class sizes http://www.manchestersalon.org.uk/does-class-size-matter.html and also http://drwilda.wordpress.com/2012/01/30/battle-of-the-studies-does-class-size-matter/
There seems to be little evidence one way or the other.
I have taught a class of 18 year 3's and found it frustrating to have that number of children because discussions and group work lacked the spark you have with a larger class. That said, the idea of marking all those books , writing all the reports and seeing all the parents will have its challenges! Peer marking and teaching the children how to work with high levels of independence will feature strongly I have no doubt!

Those children who will be remaining in our class for the next academic year start off at an advantage I feel as they already know the routines of the class and will be able to help the others settle in and find their feet. Children who will be moving onto a new class having spent their Y4 and 5 in our class have all made significant progress this year (3 sub levels for 6 out of the seven in reading  all bar one with SpLD two sub levels in maths and writing ) with the greatest progress being in their confidence and willingness to have a go.

I think that it is a privilege to be able to "keep" some children for more than one year- I once followed a whole class through from year 4 to 5 and it was definitely one of the most successful experiences I have had so far.

I'd be very interested in any responses re. children staying in classes.

100 words week 48

This week the prompt is

'I blamed it on the dog'


http://jfb57.wordpress.com/2012/07/02/100-word-challenge-for-grown-ups-week-48/

Having pretty much finished my end of year reports (yeah) and my 50K (whoopee) thought I'd do this week's.
Check out the rest at http://www.linkytools.com/wordpress_list.aspx?id=152359&type=basic


Anniversary

“I’ll be home by seven!” You’d promised. You were gone before I’d made it out of bed. Yawning,  I went downstairs to make myself a cup of tea, hoping that you might have left me at least a clue that you’d remembered.

Nothing.

Not strictly true; one dirty mug on the table.

I waited in all day just in case.

Nothing.

Seven o’clock came and went. The lovingly prepared meal scraped into the bin, the wine drunk.

Eight O’clock...

Nine O’clock...

Half past nine, “Sorry I’m late. What’s for tea?”

I blamed it on the dog as I headed for the stairs and ripped the card in two.

Campnanowrimo

I HAVE DONE IT :)
Yes, I  have managed to write 50 000 words in a month (51, 490 to be precise!)
I am going to save it in lots of places and leave it for a while before coming back to read through and edit. I plan to put some extracts on my blog - would be really interested in feedback.
The whole point was to see if I could write that much and try to tie it into a coherent story. I have never written this much before and am really pleased that I did it :O)

One day I hope to write something that will be published. In the meantime I will keep on practising.

I'm a scientist!

This term , along with many other schools across the country, we have been learning lots about the Olympic games. It has been of particular relevance to schools in Dorset as the sailing events are to be held at Weymouth and the torch is going to be spending several days along the world heritage site Jurassic coast.
http://www.spiritofbridport.org/category/news/
http://www.visit-dorset.com/whats-on/london-2012-sailing/the-olympic-torch-relay

We have been having fun planning our own sports day which will be happening (weather permitting) later this week.

Something a little different that I have done with my class this term is "I'm a scientist!"

  ‘I’m a Scientist, Get me out of Here!’ is a free online event where school students get to meet and interact with scientists. It’s a free X Factor-style competition between scientists, where the students are the judges.

Pitting students against scientists in a live round of intense, fast-paced, quick fire online live CHATs. Students get the chance to ASK scientists all the questions they want to, then VOTE for their favourite scientist to win prize of £500 to communicate their work with the public.' http://imascientist.org.uk/

We had a fabulous live science chat last week where the children could ask science related questions. What a fast paced session it was- here are some of the questions and answers we had:

gordon : What inspired you to become a scientist?

classash : @Stuart who do you think your information will be useful to?

classash : stuart are you always so cheerful or is being asientist hard work?

classash : @stuart when you were little was your dream to be a scientists

trumpetdude : @ stuart how many skin sellls can you fit in a bath

classash : @stuart are you friends with any of the other scientists

jadey2412 : hi @stuart what does it feel like being a scientist

classash : have you always wanted to be a sientist?

classash : @stuart how many skin cells on one body

classash : @stuart what are muscles made of.

youforgotthebluebe : @stuart were you the smartist in your class?

abigail6995 : @Stuart did you study alot of science at high school or were you not as interested in science then you are now?

jadey2412 : hi @ stuart whats the most toxic thing you have used before and explain why?

abigail6995 : what type of experiments do you do? Are they on humans or something else?

classash : @stuart thank you for coming and answering all our questions we have learnt a lot

hetty123 : @stuart it's great that you answered all those questions I didn't know that theres so many different sciences to do?

mrshalford : @stuart thanks so much- the class are quite literally buzzing with excitement and are very impressed with your speed of answering

classash : @Stuart thak you for all the chat it was fun

THIS CHAT WAS AMAZING AND FUN

Here are some of stuart's answers. You can read his profile at http://7-11.imascientist.org.uk/profile/stuartgray

• stuartgray : @jacobr i use many pieces of equipment. Bikes, treadmills, analysers for oxygen, strenght testing equipment, centrifuges. The list can go on and on and on......

stuartgray : @youforgettheblu ebe I was one of the smartest in my class but there is always someone cleverer than you!!

stuartgray : @abigail yes i studies maths, physics, chemistry and biology at high school. I have always liked science

stuartgray : @jadey2412 formaldehyde as it can send you to sleep, very toxic in large amounts

stuartgray : @jadey2412 i enjoyed in class experiments when you got to see explosions or anythign cool like that!

stuartgray : @gordon @trumpetdude I do enjoy being a scientist and it is because of the variety of things and the discoveries you can make. Also things like this are very fun!!

stuartgray : L@ the best chemicals I have used are the radioisotopes. they are radioactive so I have to very careful with them, but they give great results

stuartgray : @classash it is quite hard being a scientist but if you enjoy it it seems more like fun than hard work

stuartgray : @abigail6995 I most definitely work as part of a team. I have many doctoral students and staff working with me in the lab. The old saying that 2 heads are better than one is very true!

stuartgray : @trumpetdude. there are many tubes, the main ones would be the blood vessels and the airways. They are very important for helping keep you all moving about!

stuartgray : @trumpetdude I probably run about 1000 miles a year. I just trianed for and ran the London Marathon this year and was beaten across the line by a women in a wedding dress

stuartgray : @hetty123 lots of scientists study biology but many also study things like the environment, engineering and chemistry for example!

stuartgray : @trumpetdude I most experiment on humans so dont do much work in plants. I did do some stuff in my early University years and found it very fascinating!

stuartgray : @1tich1 we all just have one overall immune system in the body but it is made of many many different parts. We have millions of immune cells in our blood to help protect against bacteria and viruses and also proteins in tissues and saliva to help to.

stuartgray : @abigail6995 a very good question. Some people have weak hearts because of their genes (i.e. they get it from their parents) and there is not that much that can be done. Others it is because they do not carry out enough exercise or have a bad diet. These people can change their lifestyle to help this

stuartgray : @gordon If the sun explodes then that would pretty much be the end of the galaxy as we would have not heat to support human life. The gravitational pull of the sun would also be lost. All in all it will be bad news but a long time away, hopefully!

stuartgray : @hetty123 probably not as many people as I would like become scientists. The more we can get the more help we can be!

stuartgray : @trumpetdude there are about 5000000000 red blood cells in a ml of blood so 330 times that. A very BIG number!

stuartgray : @classash I think my research will be useful to medical practitioners who need to know the exact amount of exercise or proper nutrition to advise people to take to help with their health

stuartgray : @hetty123 Being a scientist involves a lot of planning experiments, trying to convince somebody to fund them and then actually carrying out the experiments!

stuartgray : @jadey2412 it feels good to be a scientist. There is a great feeling when you realise you are the first person in the world to discover something!

stuartgray : @classash that is a lot of good questions. Not sure about the skin cells in the bath, but a very large number! Muscles are made of protein, the main ones being actin and myosin.

stuartgray : @jacobr I qualified with my PhD (doctorate) in 2007 so I would say i have been a proper scientist for 5 years!

stuartgray : @akni I think i always have wanted to be a scientist. It was always my favourite subject at school and I think you should get more of it!

stuartgray : @youforgottheblu ebe I never actually remember deciding to become a scientist it just all seemed to fall into place!

stuartgray : @hetty123 I wouldnt say it was easy. it does involve a lot of hard work and study. but it is fun!

I was incredibly impressed by the range of questions the children (y5) asked and how sensibly they took part in the session. It really highlighted to me the importance of  making science relevant and of showing children how science is used in jobs and everyday life. I will wait to see which scientist wins the £500 award...

As I look through the new curriculum in detail I plan to work with colleagues across our cluster schools to shape a curriculum for science that will motivate and enthuse our pupils, that will show them ways that science is used by real people in the local area in the here and now, not just what happened in the past.

I want to make better use of the internet to show how science makes a difference in our lives. 

That is my plan , I'm hoping that my colleagues will want to come along for the journey.